18 December 2013
"Be thankful for the breath you just took,
because someone out there just took their last."
It's been quite a roller coaster ride for us the past two weeks, weeping our eyes with tears... and the m
ourning of our late-Grandpa.
Grandpa was admitted to SGH since 8 December and the family has been traveling in and out of SGH to visit Grandpa since then. His health deteriorates each day passes since his last admission to SGH sometime in October for flu.
On Tuesday, the speech therapist suggested that he is to be put on tube as the food and drinks intake isn't passing by the 'right channel' which will cause much further complications like lung infections and could have worsen the current condition. Of course, green light is given so tube was inserted when I was there on Tuesday evening. He resisted in pain... but with the help of Jade, the tube was inserted and first intake of medicine was administrated thru the tube. The tube was then eventually taken down by him on that very night after I left even we tried to plead him to have the tube on repeatedly.
On Thursday afternoon, Moma texted me informing that Grandpa's condition looks pessimistically that he required to use oxygen tank/mask to breathe and get me to ask aunt Linda if she can change her flight back earlier. That evening, Grandpa was panting very hard even with the help of oxygen mask when I visited him. He also tried to bring down the mask like how he wanted to pull the tube out and we have to constantly hold his hands down or pleaded him repeatedly "tolong tolong" not to remove the mask. We even resorted in tying him so that he cannot reach the mask. It feels so so so pain to see him in this state. Moma stayed over for the next two nights.
I ignored Moma's order not to frequent my trips to hospital and went down every evening since Thursday (
luckily I did...). I even showed him the past video clips I captured of Baby N's movement in my belly (
thanks to ah Thiang reminded me to show Grandpa the videos clips)... at least he was still in 'clear state of mind', nodding his head when I played the video clips to him on Saturday evening. We constantly reminded him that aunt Linda will be back on that very Sunday morning and baby Bro will be back from HK holiday to visit him on Sunday too.
Forturnately for aunt Linda, she managed to spend the last two nights with Grandpa before he catches his last breathe and left us on the morning of 16 December, 2.43am.
The 3-days wake was held at the void deck of my Grandfam's... I remembered clearly that the first night's moonlight was super bright and round and it was sunny, bright and windy for the next two days... Moma also mentioned that Grandpa left us on the same 'lunar date' as our late-great Grandma eighteen years ago. I was allowed to send Grandpa off the final journery before his body was cremated at Mandai Crematorium.
Only his memories with us will live in my heart now and forever and I believe he will continue to bestow his blessings on each and everyone of us when he reaches that 极乐世界。
I missed you Grandpa.
外公走的那一晚 - 农历十一月十四的月亮特别圆，特别亮。外公，您一路走好。
Last family shot with my late-Grandpa (before his health starts to deteriorate) - taken at Grams' place during this year's Mid-Autumn Festival family dinner.
